"THIS IS *NOT* A SCAM!"

How many times have we seen ads that begin like this, that we just skip right over? Or delete?

I'd have to say a countless many.

I was compelled to write this article yesterday as I was going through ads that people wanted to place in my ezine. Even with high-visibility ad placement, you're STILL lost if the ad itself is terrible.

So ... my mission today is to warn YOU of the many disgraceful faux pas that can make any and every ad campaign a flop. Each of the following five ad-writing techniques can mean DEATH to your ad's success.

Let the user beware.

      SUICIDE MISSION #1:

      Use phrases like "This is NOT a scam!"

First of all, if it's not a scam, you shouldn't need to waste valuable advertising space to tell me that. Talk more about your product and what it IS -- not what you claim it ISN'T.

In addition to lessening the credibility of your ad, you're also telling us that you're not confident enough about what you offer to leave that judgment up to us.

      SUICIDE MISSION #2:

      Use phrases like "HEY you! FREE SEX!!!"

Just *why* would people think we'd want to buy something from (or work with) someone that uses street corner "cat calls" to get our attention?

Major "DUH!" moment here.

This was a very popular technique designed to make readers take notice of an ad due to the shock factor in seeing the word "SEX" in huge letters. Problem was, it was commonly (and disgracefully) used to advertise BUSINESS opportunities.

Thank heavens we don't see THAT much any more.

Again, spend your time telling people about your product ... not yelling offensive obscenities at them. If sex is completely irrelevant to what you actually offer, why run the very real risk of targeting the wrong audience?

      SUICIDE MISSION #3:

      USE ALL CAPS IN YOUR ENTIRE AD.

Not only is this unnecessary, it's also rude. All caps means that you're "yelling" at your audience, and should only be selectively used to stress certain points.

Typing everything in all caps also makes your text VERY hard to read. That's why companies' limitations of liability (in "terms of use" agreements) are always typed in all caps, I gather.

Whaddya think?

      SUICIDE MISSION #4:

      Write a down-right BORING advertisement, like...

"If you ever wanted to make money on the Internet, you can do it now, with XYZ Company. My sponsor makes money like this every day. You can be like us and sell what we sell. http://I'm-a-Big-Loser.com"

And not ONLY was that ad boring, it told me nothing but the fact that you sell things, your sponsor makes money, and you think I can make money from whatever mysterious product you sell. Huh?!

HINT: If your ad doesn't get your prospect EXCITED about what you offer, it's *not* doing its job.

Which leads me to...

      SUICIDE MISSION #5:

Spend a lot more time telling me how your product works than how it can improve my life.

I don't care that SpeedyCleen Vacuum Cleaners have a 75ft long hose.

I want to know that SpeedyCleen guarantees that my 4ft 10inch stepmother will finally be able to reach those cobwebs in the formerly impossible-to-reach crevices in her vaulted ceiling.

We don't care that ZippyLemon Laundry Detergent has a "garden-fresh" lemon scent.

We want to know that ZippyLemon will blast out the three-year-old mustard stain on our husbands' favorite shirts ... in only ONE washing.

      AND SO...

To make a long story short, spend more time telling prospects HOW your product will make THEIR lives easier, not how the gadgets on it work. Do this, and boost your ad's response rate several times over.

TIP: Be sure to check out the follow-up to this article, "The Top 5 Ad Tricks to Seduce Your Prospects Into ACTION".